I was hesitating to write this post because it concerns my very private matters. However, in daily life, I am surrounded by young mums. They talk next to me about their kid’s pooping, the bleeding at delivery and all the other disgusting and private topics which I am not particularly happy to listen to.

So I thought to myself: why cannot I talk about my private matters just once? So, I started to talk about what I am just going through, openly.

What Happened at the In-Vitro Clinic Seven Years Ago?

So… Seven years ago, I entered an in-vitro clinic in Warsaw. The reasons were practical; I needed to get some expensive blood tests. And they offered to do this for me in exchange for being a donor of egg cells.

A deal like any other. What was worrying though, was what they told me afterwards.

Namely, even though I got quite some hormonal stimulation to grow the cells, only 4 eggs fully developed in the process. And for worse, they were quite deformed. This was a bad predictor for the future.

According to Doyle et al. (2016), the chance of a live birth from frozen eggs rises steeply with the number banked.

And the doctor threatened me that I should probably get pregnant as soon as I can so that I don’t lose it all. I was 23, with no studies finished just yet, no profession, no spare money and no partner. So I decided to hold on and risk doing nothing about this.

What Changed When I Froze My Egg Cells Again?

And now, in 2016, I decided to rerun the procedure of freezing egg cells, just for my benefit. I think problems should be prevented rather than solved. So instead of waiting for the black thoughts to come, I decided to go freeze my egg cells – and then proceed to partying and meeting new people afterwards.

In the procedure, I had to go through more or less the same steps as seven years ago: blood tests, hormonal stimulation, USG, and finally the surgery under full anaesthesia. But even though the steps were the same, it all came out differently to me. Namely, I no longer had any issues with growing cells.

Even better; I grew 20 (yes, twenty) healthy cells in one cycle whereas, as I had been informed before, the expectancy was something between 6 and 18.

According to Cobo et al. (2016), the number of eggs banked is the strongest predictor of later success. The doctors were truly confused; they knew about my previous records. But could not explain what had happened to my body in the meantime.

But I think I know why this is the case. Namely, my lifestyle, including too many activities per day, poor amounts of sleep, and a tendency to drink coffee, coke and some booze, did not change since seven years ago. Only one thing substantially changed.

How Does Chronic Stress Affect Fertility?

One of the main reasons for infertility is the persistent, high-stress level. According to Lynch, Sundaram, Maisog, Sweeney and Buck Louis (2014), couples with higher measured stress levels took significantly longer to conceive. They also faced a higher risk of infertility overall.

Do you recall all these couples trying to conceive a baby who does not succeed for years and years? They keep the schedule and try, and try, and try. Then, one day they go on vacation to Bali and all of a sudden hit the target.

According to Whirledge and Cidlowski (2010), the stress hormones released during the body’s stress response can directly suppress the reproductive hormone system. This offers a physiological explanation for that pattern.

I just reduced the baseline stress by moving to a country with much higher comfort of living. Then, I found myself a stable income outside academia. This was more than enough to come back to form, and even get a huge rebound.